Sadness of Life

I just found out about a friend losing a loved one, a child, today.  That has to be one of the most tragic things a parent, can go through.  Loss of anyone is hard, but the loss of a child is indescribable.

What do you say to someone in those instances?  I'm sorry for your loss?  Please accept my sincerest condolences?  You're in my prayers?  They're all used by many people, but nothing can describe how you feel in your heart for those unfortunate parents.

I try not to use cliches' and just put down on paper or type or say what I honestly feel right at that moment that would convey the heartfelt pain I feel for them at that time.  Example:  Ohhhhhhh, (person), I don't have the words to tell you how sorry I am and how horrible I feel inside for you at this time.  There are no words to say that would be able to help you now, but I just wanted you to know that I grieve for you.  

My prayers are with you, I believe, is a very good thing to say, if it's for real.  Don't say something like that if you have no intention of praying for that person or their family.  Prayer is a powerful thing.  It's real!  It can bring peace into a situation that they don't even understand, but are grateful for.  It can even help them find something that will give them a sense of peace or closure if you know them well enough.  It's not just a cliche'.

I think that we need to be honest with people, not politically correct.  I hate those cliches' that come out of the mouths of police when they have to tell someone about a death on the TV shows I watch.  But they're not connected either.  They're just saying something to let the person that they have to talk to know that they realize the actual death in their family is the most important thing at that moment.....then they go on with their questions, of course, which is why they are there.  But as a friend and acquaintance, I think we need to try and convey our true feelings to them as honestly and clearly as we can.  We owe it to them and to ourselves in order to mourn a catastrophic loss such as this when it's needed.  

I read in a devotional today:  In Genesis, Eve went through a great disappointment. Her son Cain killed her son Able which was the first murder in the Bible. I’m sure Eve, like any mother, was devastated and heartbroken at the passing of her son. But I love what Eve said in Genesis 4:25, “God has appointed another seed for me.” In essence, she was saying, “I don’t understand it. It doesn’t make sense, but I trust God. This is not the end. He has appointed another seed.”  

I liked that because in this life we have to realize tragedy is going to happen to the "just" and the "unjust".  That is life!  We have to realize, after a time of mourning, that life does go on and if you do know God as your personal Lord and Savior, He has more for you; this is not the end.  Who knows what can come of tragedies?  Helping others get through them, setting up funds to help others who've gone through the same things, opening establishments for people to find help in their time of need, or just simply being a volunteer in organizations that deal with similar tragedies you've gone through already.  

We're all connected and need to realize that there are two things that you can do when tragedy strikes:  1)  go through it and learn and be strengthened by it or 2)  stay in that sadness and lose yourself in it.  I hope you know God and chose number one.....

"Love one another", John 13:34